?

Log in

No account? Create an account
WARMTH LIKE HOME UNAWARES — LiveJournal
thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
[sticky post]
2020-01-26 01:58 am

~ Currently Playing ~
UNLIMITED:Saga

~ Currently Watching ~
Star Trek: The Next Generation

~ Currently Reading ~



HUMPCHARTCollapse )

207CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-04-02 11:02 am

It's time for Armic's arduous adventures to come to a close, so he can finally get back to his home in Chapa, and his tribe can perform Iskandar's rainmaking ritual.

Yun told us that the final item we needed to collect, Ares's Banner, is at Flying Island, one of the Seven Wonders. Seems a strange place for Ares's Banner to be, really... but off we go!

Read more...Collapse )

Tags: ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-04-02 09:12 am

Well, it's finally time to recap everything that happened in Armic's adventure leading up to going to the final Wonder. I did almost all the subadventures, so it took a while, plus I haven't really been playing as much recently, trying to work on the site.

This time I'm going to feature a subadventure that I kind of just glossed over before, because it's pretty neat. But first, the other junk:

Read more...Collapse )

Tags: ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-31 05:00 pm

I finished Armic's scenario in unsaga last night. I have two entries to write for it. I have only a couple of entries left to clean up for the site, then I'll just be working on the tutorial part mostly. Which is also mostly written but I think I'm going to redo a lot of it.

Even though I was going to stop playing after I finished these scenarios to get the website up then resume playing, I like... really want to start on Laura's scenario already lollll.

Tags: ,

3CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-25 10:37 am
Was thinking today -- for a long time I said my favorite unsaga character was Thomas but now I like... super super love Grace and Pharr like... probably even more than him? So I was wondering if I just had like... a "tier list" of favorite characters, who all would be in the top tier.

Grace, Pharr, Thomas, Rebecca, Roy, Marie, Fae, Vearst, Anzan, Platy, Josef, Michelle... and if non-player characters count then also Jeanne and Galeos (and uh Joachim LOL)...

I just really love a lot of characters XD Like half the cast is top tier hahaha. Other SaGa games I usually have a smaller top tier. SaGa Frontier is unique in that it probably has the smallest top tier... It would probably just be Emelia, Liza, and Annie. And uh, maybe Asellus. I need to actually play through her scenario. I only ever finished the intro which was pretty cool.

RSG2 doesn't have many either but I also haven't really played it much. Leon, of course, but it's like 90% the hair/mustache. And Koumei for like... the same reasons lol. But most characters in that game are like... generic units, so :\

Anyway, I mostly just wanted to say the unsaga thing, not get into all the rest of this XD Also, here's a survey thing that I stole from Kenny on fb:

Read more...Collapse )

Tags: , , , ,

2CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-23 10:33 pm
I had a therapy today and it was good. I have been playing a little unsaga, too.

That's about it. I just felt like I should update LOL but I don't really have anything to say.

2CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-22 04:28 pm
IDK if I updated about this last night but

The programming for all of the play diary sites is done. Well, not Innocent Life but I'm not going to add that til later I think. Because that's a ton more editing and going back and finding images I deleted and stuff...

So I'mma work on editing the rest of the entries (partly done with Scarlet Grace and need to do all of RSG3) and programming the grammin tut site. Then I'll be ready for launch. IDK if I'll launch right away or try to finish up some more of the play diaries and iron out the programming site or what.

I also plan to eventually have many subsites, like an art portfolio site, and I was to make some game fansites (well, maybe not multiple, but I at least want to create a serebii-like site for unsaga, then might expand it to the whole series?)

So I'm feeling pretty good lol.

I have therapy tomorrow and am actually looking forward to going. I think I might (MIGHT) be able to deal with the waiting room better this time. But I have a lot to talk about and like... usually a big thing that makes me nervous is I feel like I won't have anything to say and won't know what to say and stuff >_>;

But I have many things this time XD From things I looked up about that we talked about last time, and what's happened in the last 3 weeks, and stuff I realized about myself, etc.

I think I already posted about my SUDDENLY SUICIDAL day a week ago, and then I thought I was falling into depression again, but I feel like I'm not anymore lolol. I think maybe I had a very short depressive episode or something, or I'm just like... a lot better at dealing/recovering from one because of meds and stuff.

BUT a thing happened today, too. After getting an autism diagnosis, I've been more analytical about my behaviors and actions. I didn't really want to think too much about it before since I wasn't really sure if I was autistic or not, but after having a doctor say so I feel more comfortable like... really analyzing myself with that perspective I guess.

Anyway, I've notice that I'm more attached to routines than I thought previously. I used to think I didn't really have any attachment to routine (which was also something that made me wonder if I might not have autism) but rather it's that I am very adverse to changing or forcing routines. Because the word "routine" makes me think of forced routines, my immediate reaction to the word "routine" is I HATE THEM lmao lmao. But I noticed that I have to do a lot of things the same every time, and things that are really not problematic at all are stressful simply if they happen out of order or at weird times or whatever, and trying to force new routines or whatever is DOOOMMMM so...

But yeah anyone who knows me (especially who knew me in college where I had a lot more control over what I ate and stuff) knows that I even do stuff like eating the same food for every meal every day for years and stuff soooo lmao. And maybe even this is a reason I don't like going places because I'm used to being at home and only going places at a certain time.

ANYWAY that was way too much introduction to the THING. One thing I'm particularly comfortable about is going to the laundromat every Wednesday morning, and then walking to the grocery while the clothes are washing because they're in the same strip mall thing.

BUT TODAY I LEARNED THE GROCERY IS CLOSING. And there was like... nothing in it. Like, just a bunch of candy (and tons and tons of Peeps). And everything was like 90% off. But there was nothing there anyway.

So uh this was stressful one because DIFFERENT and two because WHERE DO I GET FOOD NOW? It's the only grocery within walking distance, and the market is closed during the time I'm at the laundromat... I can go with my dad to the grocery if he goes on a weekday but it's really stressful not knowing what day it's going to be and sometimes he even goes on a day or at a time when I can't go soooo uh LOL JUST NO FOOD I GUESS. I guess I can start going to the market some time on like Tuesday afternoon or something idk...

ANYWAY so it was actually kinda fun in the empty grocery except the music was loud and the people cleaning up made some loud noises and I got scared lmao. But I did get some cherry jujus for only 15 cents!! And I had 54 cents so I was able to get three lol. I gave one box to my brother and going to give one to Dennis too.

So, I was needing to get groceries today but I couldn't, so I asked my brother if he would go to the market with me and he said no. So I went by myself. And like a fire truck came by and the noise about killed me, and then I got to the market and realized it was closed, even though I know it opens at 9, but I'm just... not used to being out walking around before 9.

So being in empty parking lot with like siren noises and SUDDENLY realizing my Wednesday grocery time will never come back and that I don't have any food kind of hit me all at once (uh plus I was not planning on walking this far and didn't wear a coat and was very cold) and I had a meltdown like... in this parking lot lmao. Well, I was able to get to the building and like... cry against the wall lol. It only lasted like... idk, 5 minutes, and then I walked back to laundro and no one could tell I had been crying because I was also just frozen so it looked like I was just super cold which I was.

Then I tried to drink coffee but I didn't want to touch the Styrofoam so I was like carrying with a napkin and drinking from a stir stick but I was trying not to look at the Styrofoam and I dropped it lololololol. But I was next to trash and I could feel it slipping so I like... leaned toward trash bin and dropped it in there. Then I didn't want to try to get another one. I actually drank a whole cup and that was my second one so yay?

Anyway, after dropping coffee and crying in a parking lot, I came home and somehow felt a lot better. Usually stuff like this would like... make me dead for a whole day but I still was able to exercise and play Imperial SaGa and work on the website a bit. I have less spoons than normal but like way more spoons than like... any other day that starts like that lmao. Also I still had a bit of food so I can still eat today and my dad said we could go to grocery tomorrow. But I was thinking of trying to start going to the grocery on like... Mondays? Like, replace my exercise that day with walking to the grocery lol and like... try to start buying more produce. Buying it on Thursday and not eating it til like Tuesday sounds like a bad idea. But the grocery is gone now so it doesn't matter so I'm going to just keep eating bologna every day lol. I have all this motivation to do actually make changes in my life but not the material wealth required to make those changes. And who knows how long this motivation will last and if it goes away when it will ever come back so LOL

But I'm feeling good for this moment so that's good LOL. And maybe by a stroke of luck someone will buy me tokimemo 3 limited edition XDDD *nudges everyone reading* and by that I mean I'm nudging no one lmaoooo

Oh yeah, in Imperial SaGa, I trained Old!Will and Tetis and they turned out pretty awesome. I also retrained Bear alongside, and he turned out good, too. I could have enjoyed a bit more Attack from Tetis but I'm still not unhappy. I've also crafted a lot of stuff, so I have enough Wisdom Pendants to outfit all my mages, and three Unparalleled Rings! I'd like to have like... at least five or six of those though. But even just having 3 is really nice.

I'm hoping Tetis will glimmer Grand Slam soon. I keep spamming the 9-star event quest (and GS is even a rank 9 art!) but it's a no-go. I sacrificed the promo Hawke I had (which had a Kobayashi art I'd never seen before?!) to give her a powered-up Shell Smash, which is pretty nice. I also cashed in all my meisei and had enough to get like 600 characters from it LOLOL but I dumped them all in the castle for medals and bought another mage robe thing and ... power suit... I don't remember the names of the armors really. WAIT, no, I bought the Vernie Suit thing, which I had none of. But it's the only armor that offers magic defense, so I think I'd like to have it for Bear.

Sadly this event is giving not very many of the ore things I need to upgrade all these armors -_-; And you can only get these ores from events and like... once this event is over the next like... several events will probably have the other kind of ores (there are 4 kinds of event ores), so like... I'll probably have to wait like 2 months before I can even collect these again :\ I do have most of my Powered Suits to +2, and I would really like to get the Witch Robe to +5 (it's at +4). And power up the Vernie Armor a couple times? But uhhhh don't have that much ore. I'd have to spam this event quest like nonstop to get enough...

Though I might spam it a lot because I really want to get the prize for 20,000 event points (or maybe it's 200,000 idk) but I'm over 3/4 of the way there, and the prize is a gold medal.

But yeah lol imsaga. I'm thirsty but all I have is water and I want like a soda or tea or something so bad XD I mean I have coffee and tea but I want a cold thing and I don't want to like make hot thing and ice it and alskdjfklasdjf just someone deliver me a Dr Pepper please. And TokiMemo3 Limited Edition. And like, a pizza or something. Er, no, I want like... curry XD

Tags: , , , , ,

6CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-21 04:51 pm

So, I got an email from ebay saying that I had a $10 coupon which was cool, but it seems you have to spend a certain amount to use it so that is lame. While there, I decided to see if anything interesting had popped up since the last time I searched and found The limited edition box set of Tokimeki Memorial 3 for only $24 D: But uh, the shipping is $26 so it's like... $50. I'm so sad tho because I defo can't afford that D: And it's one of my fav games of all time... and it even comes with little figures of all the girls D: Well, the six 'main' ones. It's the first and only time I've ever seen it for sale :\ though I saw another one on there for even more lol. it had the obi around the box so that's cool but I can easily go without that lmao.

I also saw the limited edition tokimemo 2 which comes with a PocketStation which is neat XD I wonder if you can use in on the US version of FF8 and play the chocobo game XD

You can use it with Rockman COMPLETE WORKS, but you have to play with someone else who has a PocketStation and the game, too... As it's a little multiplayer-only thing :\

But yeah it sucks not having money to spend on luxuries .__. generally I don't think much of it because I can get along pretty well with what I have, but when I see things I want it feels bad XD I should just not go to ebay ever XD

Anyway, I caught up with all the unsaga play diaries for my site, now I need to actually put together the sagasca and romasaga3 subsites, but it will be mostly c/p of the unsaga site with some minor changes, and then do all those entries... Shouldn't take too long to do them. Then I'll start on the tutorial which may take a while, but...

Also, here's some imsaga crap: Read more...Collapse )

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-20 06:55 pm

Hello friends.

Sooo I've been working on website and I have a really fast way of doing it now, and all I really have to do is essentially edit the rest of the entries -- all the images and everything are already ready to go, cropped, resized, converted to jpg... it's pretty much just c/p the diary entries and add tags while looking over it. I'm already into Armic's scenario so I'm almost done with unsaga (by 'done' I mean caught up) and then it will just be romasaga3 and sagasca which shouldn't be terribly long.

I think I started giving myself deadlines and stuff like 'I need to finish all this by the weekend' or whatever and the pressure made me kinda fall into depression again. It does not help that Thursday I decided for who knows what reason to look for a job, which is a super overwhelming and stressful thing to me, and by the end of the day I was poking at myself with a box knife saying if I just practice making little cuts I can work up slashing my whole wrist!!! But uh no it's way too scary I can't even like poke myself without freaking out lol.

The weekend was fine and I even did a Scary Thing and was ok (I went to craft store with Dens and it was crowded lol) and then today I have like absolutely no motivation at all and I think it's because I'm putting too much pressure on myself or sth, plus after Thursday I was putting pressure on myself not to be depressed again which... I guess was counterproductive lol. Thanks to Nans for pointing it out though lol. I was def weird on Friday because Dens kept asking me if I was okay, like "ARE YOU SURE YOURE OK" and stuff like... so many times lol. But I think I was just being like, super quiet and having trouble concentrating.

Anyway, after talking it over with Nans I feel a bit more optimistic and I'm going to not pressure myself and just go at my own pace with the website like I was, and talk to my therapist about jobs this week. When I went to my psychologist on Monday last week, he has to like... go over this list of stressors or something, so every time he asks me like... if there have been changes in my living situation, if I'm still happy with Dens, etc. and it ends with "Are you still unemployed?" and "Are you looking for a job?" And it makes me feel so worthless and embarrassed X_X I realize the reason he is asking is because those things are big stressors to people and like he has to monitor that but like... idk I just hate having it like... rubbed in my face? lol. Even though that's not what he's trying to do. I did get a grape lolli though.

I think sicne I've done nothing at all today and it's already 19:00 (and I got up around 9, so like... 10 hours of doing nothing at all) I might just play unsaga, because it's fun and it will kinad feel like progress since it goes toward content for the website. I think if I can resume the pace I was at before, I can actually catch up with all the play diaries by the end of the week, and maybe even start working on the programming tut.

Once I get the first lesson of the programming tut done, I think I'm going to actually pay for hosting and get the website online, and then try to add new content every week. I can easily do the editing and stuff when I'm around Dens, as well as playing games, so I'll probably do a lot of the initial writing while I'm at the apartment during the week, and publish new stuff over the weekend. I'll probably continue to post everything here first, but it will be like a 'rough draft,' and then the edited version will get posted to the website.

I might wait a bit to actually get the website up because -- well, not WAIT but rather it might take a bit longer because I think I'm going to program a thing that finds the most recent entries and everything for a front page, and maybe even program a blog. That probably sounds time-consuming but it actually would be pretty easy. I might create a like submission widget for myself so I can easily add new content without having to go and edit tables with SQL manually every time, but ... it really wouldn't be THAT convenient and I kinda like editing tables anyway. So I might just implement something like that if I really feel like I need it in the future.

Anyway, I've also been thinking about what I'm going to do next in unsaga and in the play diaries in general. I think once I get the website up, I'll finish up Armic and Mikhail scenarios, and then I'll start playing one tokimemo and one SaGa at a time. Three SaGas at a time was a bit... much hahaha. And I'll probably continue on with unsaga unless I get a huge hankering to play something else. Which recently I've really been wanting to play minsaga because I want to see Baldyhad again. And I've also really been wanting to get back into Scarlet Grace because it was really fun the first time and I'm excited to play another game.

But I also super love unsaga and am excited about playing through all seven scenarios and having a finished diary XD

In my next Scarlet Grace game, I'm going to be playing Urpina (that's what the comet gave me XD) and I'm going to try to focus on raising a team of 10 characters -- five guys and five gals. This way I can get the 'use a team of all men/women' bonuses more easily, plus I like having some substitute characters anyway. I think I have a better idea of how to really power up the party this time around so I won't fall behind like I did with Leo's party.

For unsaga, I think I'm going to do a 'no shopping' run with Laura. I considered trying to do the 'true' Weapon Collector's Challenge (no shopping, no repair, no martial panels) but I'm worried it will end up being too hard and turn into a chore to play. So I might just like, do that on my own, but not part of the play diaries.

And then with Judy I think I'm going to do a 'no weapons' run, where you just... can't equip anything in the two weapon slots. Basically the focus will be more on martial arts and magic arts.

I'm actually considering like... maybe some time in the future adding more challenge runs to the play diaries, like... even after clearing all 7 characters, like... just add some more 'bonus' diaries, like if I want to do additional challenge runs. I can't imagine ever getting to a point where I just... don't want to play unsaga anymore?

I was also thinking of what I could do play diaries of besides SaGa and TokiMemo. The other three series in my main five are Harvest Moon, Mega Man, and Ys.

Harvest Moon... I think I could figure out a way to do a play diary of that, I think. I think more just making a diary of entire play sessions, rather than trying to like... make a day-by-day diary would be better. I might actually make the day-by-day diary just like... little notes of what I did each day, but as like... extra content?? I was even thinking of like... hand-writing it with little doodles to make it cute.

Mega Man is lol. It's not really... that kind of game. But before ever starting the play diary thing, I was planning on trying to do (segmented) no-damage runs of all the Mega Man games. So I could make a play diary about that specifically? That seems kinda fun. Because just clearing one stage takes a long time for that. And I could fill the entries with all kinds of Mega Man infodumping and roboperving XD

Ys... IDK. I guess when I think about it, they wouldn't make for bad play diaries, but at the same time, the game is 90% about the action. It's like Mega Man with more story lmao. So IDK what I'd do with those. Of my top 5 Ys is like... probably my least favorite hahaha. I mean it's still top 5 though.

I also kind of want to start doing more videos again... I'm considering when I do the Harvest Moon play diaries to like... also make videos of them as I do them? It will also help me like... remember what I did in the game to make the diaries lolol. Oh, that would be like... super cute if I like... recorded each day as its own thing and then like... recorded myself drawing the little diary part XD Actually that's a super cute idea... I hope I can remember it.

I was also considering doing play diaries of like... games similar to the top 5 in some way, like Bionic Commando which is a lot like Mega Man, and The Last Remnant which is a lot like SaGa, stuff like that. Shepherd's Crossing. And just anything I really feel like I'd like to make a play diary about. But I want to focus on the top 5, and especially SaGa and Tokimemo XD

And then I also thought of doing a like play diary series where I like... do something like... play every single NES game ever LOL. And like write about my experience with each. And I'd try to play them all to completion XD That would be fun.

Anyway, these are just like... ideas lmao. For now I'm just going to work on getting the site up, finishing unsaga, starting tokimemo, and getting back to the programming tuts.

Well, writing this made me feel a bit more motivated. I'mma go play a bit of Armic's scenario now though. Prol won't be enough to write an entry because I'm just going to be doing random already-written-about subadventures.

Oh I just remembered I need to like... do the Innocent Life diary too. LOLOL. Well, I might not include that in the launch of the website hahaha.

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-17 07:15 pm

So, Armic's party is getting pretty powered up, so we're going to head to Nakle Lines, one of the scariest subadventures in the game.

In case you've forgotten, this is the place with the five patterns on the ground you must finish, then fight Maane and Malig after each, finally leading up to a battle with Tagut in the central laboratory area.

Read more...Collapse )

Tags: ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-16 11:07 pm

Lots and lots of subadventures have passed. I'm going to gloss over many of them, since they're ones we've seen before, and nothing particularly amazing happened. And then I am going to detail one of the more interesting ones at the end :)

Read more...Collapse )

Tags: ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-16 08:21 pm

While we bought some of the magic we wanted, there's still a couple expensive arts I want to pick up. But we're also kind of running out of things to do without sealing any Abyss Gates. If you remember what we learned from Johannes and Anna in Lance, the Abyss Gates can be found in Toughturn Mountain, Great Western Ocean, the jungles of the south, and the Devil Emperor's Palace.

Of all of these, we're most familiar with the Devil Emperor's Palace, because that's where we had to go to rescue Gon when he ran off looking for Mitch.

So, it's off to Pidona.

Read more...Collapse )

Tags: ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-16 08:10 pm

So once I got to where the images are on tumblr, it's actually a lot faster to edit the play diary posts... because the images are still in the posts! I can just save them all quickly and then rename them as I go a lot more easily, too. I've made a bunch of vim recordings that help me reformat various things, so overall it's going much faster. I could probably finish unsaga by the end of the weekend if I would actually work on it lolol.

But I suddenly got hit with a wave of demotivation. Or rather like... restless frustration? I'm like angry at life and don't want to do anything, and keep randomly worrying about things in the far future that I have no reason to worry about. I'm trryyyyiing not to but lol.

But yeah I might force myself to keep up editing the play diaries for the rest of the night since I don't have anything else to do anyway. I'm in Kurt's scenario now. I also played a little bit more of unsaga and have something great to add to that diary too~~

A new event started in imsaga and there's a promo Baldyhad *_* Of course, promo characters are way too weak for me to use them anymore, but it's still cool to get a Baldyhad~~

I have enough kr for two more big pulls, but I think I'm going to try to save them up again. There's really nice character with Rainbow chance tomorrow but... I think I'd rather save it for my favs or when they add unsaga stuff.

I've mastered some of the highest level roles now, and I have crafted two wisdom pendant things, which is awesome (it boosts magic like 15 or 20 or something *_*!)

I'm probably just going to grab the witch robe thing from the current event and that's it. Maybe I should like... try to run through the story a couple more times while I'm not doing much with events? Like, get some more stuff in my history. I think I have all the 7 and 8 star quests now. But I can S-Rank up to 9 star easily enough. There's probably some egg route quests I don't have. I don't think I'm really up to trying the cube route yet... I think the very first quest in it is like 10 or 11-star?! I can clear up to 12 stars but they are hard. And if the first quests are that high, I probably would get stuck somewhere...

But yeah seeing Baldyhad makes me wanna play Minstrel Song D:

ETA: lol forgot I disabled auto-formatting for the sake of writing the last romasaga3 entry. Actually maybe I'll work on those. I have one more of those to write, and a couple unsaga entries to write, too.

Tags: , , , ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-14 07:53 pm

Since we're low on money but want to buy some new magic arts, we're going to head back into the desert to go to a place that I bypassed before.

Read more...Collapse )

Tags: ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-14 07:28 pm

Oh yeah, I forgot to ever make a post about this, and it's like... two weeks old now.

Imperial SaGa added a new "Role System" to the game!

Read more...Collapse )

Tags: ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-14 07:19 pm
Well I went to the doctor and after explaining some random things they said it's probably related to asthma (which I have but it doesn't cause me a lot of problems anymore) because recently I had a cold with a lot of coughing plus I've been exercising more and my lungs are like angry or something. I got an inhaler, and now I have a new type of Welbutrin (same dosage, just I only have to take one a day instead of two throughout the day). So uh yay fun.

I finished editing all of Ruby's scenario for the play diary website~~ It will probably take me a few weeks to catch up to everything though X_X I'm kinda tired of editing them because I've been like... doing it nonstop for like 4 or 5 days now. Well, I don't mind doing it, really, but it's annoying to go find all the images again. I used to only upload the ones I was going to use onto FB but now I've gotten to the point where I was just dumping the entire collection of screenshots I made, so I have to read the entry and go try to find which picture goes with it, and like... THAT is not fun lol.

Once I get to where I started uploading to Tumblr, it will be ... another set of problems, namely finding the correct tumblr posts, but at least it will be back to only uploading the images I used.

But I think for today I might actually write the next posts in Armic and Mikhail's tales. I can just disable auto-formatting here on DW and format them the way I want to use them on my site... and while I'm selecting pics, I can just move the ones I want to use to the site's folders already, and then upload them to tumblr from there (since I'm still not actually hosting the site yet, I gotta upload the pics elsewhere XD)

Then editing the post will simply be a matter of swapping the URLs for the images. Actually, I could even write the post for the site first, and swap the urls for DW, so I'd basically get both done right away.

If I finish these posts early enough, maybe I will play a bit more unsaga. But I've been going to bed super early so I'll probably end up sleeping afterward.

I counted walking to the doctor as my exercise today (it was like... over an hour of walking XD) and yesterday I like... couldn't bring myself to do it so I reallllyyyy gotta make sure I do it properly tomorrow.

Tags: , , , ,

2CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-13 03:43 pm

All my journal titles are like "things" and "woo" and "stuff" lol.

Anyway, went to the doctor today, as in Dr Nolan, and like... I'm kind of tired of everyone taking my situation so seriously even though... they are doing so... because it's serious LOL but I guess rather I just hate hearing "Well, with the severity of your symptoms..." or whatever because it feels bad lolol.

Anyway, I don't have to go for another 2 months and got a grape lolli. Also he was really nice and I like Dr Nolan a lot.

I also stopped by Dr Marlin's office (they are in the same building, like, across the hall from each other) to make an appointment because I've been having a tightness in my chest for like... 2 weeks lolol. And they were like uhhhh you should come sooner and I'm like yeah but telephone. Anyway they got me an appointment with a nurse practitioner tomorrow since I wouldn't be able to see Dr Marlin herself for over a week. I really don't want to go to the doctor two days in a row but X_X;;;

I super don't feel like doing anything today, like, not even playing games or anything. I've been exercising every day but I didn't today oops. And then I still haven't done KA today, even though I'm looking forward to the next section in calculus. I barely even was able to eat. Doing things is so exhausting?

I feel like I have like very limited jutsu points and going to the dr or whatever is like a special jutsu that uses all my remaining points no matter their level, and I can't get any more until I sleep overnight lolol. Except I always die at the end of the battles so I never get jutsu power up anyway.

I made some coffee but now I'm like afraid to leave my room to do anything else lolol. But it's cold now and I would like to pour it over ice and maybe put some vanilla cream stuff in it.

Me at doctor's appointment: Yes, I am doing very well and becoming more capable of managing my anxieties and stuff. Not really thinking about dying and stuff.

Me like literally 10 mintues later: I want to die and I am never leaving my room again and everything is scary literally everything.

Tags: , ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-11 06:49 pm

So, I've been working on the website. I have the unsaga diary page pretty much done, now I just have the process of converting all of the entries to html pages. I know I could probably do this with a script, but I'm also going back through and editing them as I go. I want to make sure that I use the correct terms for stuff (like say Growth Panel instead of 'panel thing' and stuff XD) and capitalize stuff and fix some grammar and typos... I'm also changing misinformation and stuff as I go.



Here's what it looks like right now. The next/back buttons in the bottom corners are fixed, so they'll stay there as you scroll the page. I actually have a few different designs (uh, they're all just like this but slightly different margins/borders) so feel free to go to fb and give me advice? XD

In the end, I will have a 'main menu' bar at the top with links to the other play diaries and my home page, too. It will be very simple.

I thought it would be tedious to go through and edit all these old entries, but I'm actually having a lot of fun reliving the old adventures with Ruby right now. Plus I'm using vim to edit, and it's been forever since I've used vim, and now I'm like.. frustrated having to use other text editors (like, I'm trying to use vim commands on the DW text editor right now LOLOL) but yeah I loooove vim so it feels very nice to use it. Makes me want to go back to using Linux XD But I have my sql server and stuff set up on Winny already, so it would be a pain to try to migrate over there. I do have a web server and stuff set up there, and all of the web dev tools I'd need (including a much more 'tricked out' vim lol, though I guess I could just copy my vimrc from there to here lol) but uh setting up the sql server again and stuff just... I don't want to XD Plus all my content is on Winny and I already have a database and tables on here and... yeah XD But I miss Lenny. I really would like to get another laptop for gaming and stuff and turn this one into a work computer that only runs Lenny.

ANYWAY. I used to want LJ (and I guess now DW) to be like, a detailed chronicle of my life lol but I hardly ever update here anymore. I think I have almost no social needs anymore (not that I had too much before) so as long as I like... tell one person about something I generally don't feel like I need to share it any more. And between Dens and my family and friends I usually end up telling someone everything before posting online, so all you get here is like OMG I HAVE ANXIETY I WANT DIE and crap.

But uh, I do want to talk about this one thing just so I can like... come back and laugh about it later XD

And that thing is that... somehow I stumbled onto this uh... nursery... rhyme? thing called "Johny Johny Yes Papa" which is this stupid song sung to the tune of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star but the lyrics are like:

Johny Johny Yes Papa
Eating sugar No Papa
Telling lies No Papa
Open your mouth Ha ha ha

And like it's supposed to be a conversation between Johny and Papa lol. Anyway, there are like 203598230958029358320958 videos of this on youtube, but somehow I stumbled onto like... this one made by this dad and his kid but they changed it to include all kinds of sweets, and it was dubbed over in Spanish?! And I have no idea how I even ended on that because I am not one of those like... youtube explorers who just clicks on random stuff like... I pretty much exclusively watch Hello! Project videos.

But somehow I saw that and clicked it which is weird on its own. BUT UH THE DAD WAS HOT and so I randomly started watching more of these and like... then I was just watching any Johny Johny Yes Papa thing I could find because it was funny and the song was stuck in my head and like there are so many weird ones... for two days I spent many hours of my day like... watching these stupid kid song things????????????????????????

And I even found like the official channel of the family that made the original one I found (as in, official channel of hot dad) and like... there's actually a lot of cute stuff on there and even though it's made for toddlers I like... watched so much lmfao.

And now constantly I have that stupid Johny Johny Yes Papa song stuck in my head, and this like Don't Put the Peeps in the Microwave thing, too...

Also I really wished I talked about H!P here ??? Well, like... more? Even when I was originally doing LJ I didn't talk about it much? Like... I have been into H!P for like 15 years now and it's one of my fav things of all time and like... idk, I feel like H!P is important to my life but I never talk about it??? But I think it's because I already have someone to talk about it with (and back then, I like... FORCED everyone around me to be into it too LOL) so I guess I don't need the outlet here??? lol. idk.

Also, I was thinking about the play diaries and it might be... quite a while before I'm able to get the website actually up and running, with all the editing and stuff, plus I might not want to publish it right away with the diaries like only partly finished?

So what I can do is just disable auto-formatting and format the entries properly on here and post them, then it will just be a matter of copy/pasting them to an html file and changing the img srcs, which shouldn't be hard at all. I can even go ahead and copy the proper images to the web directories so I pretty much can quickly just go in and change the urls... in fact, I'd be able to do it with just minimal effort after posting them to DW.

So I'll probably start doing those when I'm tired of editing the pages.

Editing all these pages is also nice because it gives me something to do that I can do without having to concentrate or think too hard, which means I can do it even with distractions, which is good, because literally everything distracts me. So a lot of times I just sit around and feel frustrated because I can't do anything. And that's something I'm going to be talking about more with my therapist lol.

but yeah since I'm just editing paragraphs at a time, and I can easily like... stop in the middle of one and restart just by rereading it from the beginning, and I can keep track of where I am because vim saves your cursor position plus the things I haven't done yet won't have the HTML tags on them... So it's something I can be interrupted with and continue doing.

But yeah, I'mma go back to editing entries now XD

Oh, yeah, I have screenshots and need to make a post about imsaga's new Roll System, which is pretty awesome XD

Tags: , , , , ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-08 08:54 pm

SOOOO If you're wondering why I haven't been uploading play diaries (haha jk no one is wondering that) it's because I forgot my controller over the weekend (I think I mentioned that?) and indeed started working on my website, which now I've become absorbed in that. A lot of the "work" so far has been learning and understanding as I've never really built a website before and I had no idea how DBMS worked or how to use PHP or CSS or anything and the extent of my HTML knowledge came from like... using lj.

So I'm moving along kinda slowly but I'm getting the hang of it. Learning exactly how databases worked and how to connect to a database server with PHP was like... the biggest hurdle I had to overcome, because I literally knew NOTHING about this subject and didn't even really know what I was supposed to be looking for.

But once I figured that part out, it's been moving pretty slowly.

I'm going to keep working on this and then migrate the play diaries over there, once I've finished it and found a way to host it. I'll also be able to host the images so there will be no more broken images, and everything will look and be organized so much nicer.

But then since I'll have the website up and working (and honestly doing the play diaries first is a good way to learn my way around all this tech before trying to make my tutorial site) I'll of course want to start working on the tutorials lol so I'll probably end up slowing down play diaries to work on tuts.

I think what I'll do is go to doing only one play diary at a time. I'll probably alternate between doing SaGa and TokiMemo plays. So I'll finish up unsaga very soon (I have enough caps and progress for another entry... I actually could probably go to the end right now, but something cool happened and it makes me want to power up the party even more XD)...

Then I'll only have RSG3 to work on, and I'll start alternating after that (so, tokimemo after rsg3, then probably another scarlet grace run or maybe unsaga again, cuz I kinda wanna finish all the scenarios XD). I actually have enough content for another RSG3 entry, too, lol.

Though I'm not going to work on this now, I kinda want to create an unsaga fansite, or maybe like an entire SaGa series fansite. Something like Serebii but for SaGa XD I appreciate the SaGa wiki but I want to be able to do more with it and not have it be on wikia and etc. But yeah XD

For now, working on website. Once I get the 'base' down, it will just be a matter of migrating all the entries. That's going to take a long time because I will 1. have to reformat each entry individually and 2. have to find all the images that broke so I can reinsert them. Though while I'm "reformatting" (which will be pretty easy) I'm going to also try to maybe fix some typos and grammar errors and stuff as I go... so that will take a while. I may even touch them up a little (like... fix paragraphing issues and stuff idk XD) just because it will bug me not to do it as I reread them looking for typos and stuff XD

So it will probably easily be a couple weeks before I get back to doing play diaries...? I don't want to create MORE reformatting work for myself by creating more entries right now XD Though I do kinda miss playing the games XDD So IDK exactly what I will do. I mean, I guess I can keep playing and just not make new posts LOL. But I don't want to like... have tons of screenshots and not remember what happened?

Anyway, that's what's happening with me lol. I also started trying to exercise... today was day 2. I have some other 'life improvements' as recommended by my therapist but uhhh they are hard LOL (it's like, facing your fears kind of things lol)

But exercising puts me in a better mood which makes me more likely to be able to do those things, so it's good. And even though it's minor stuff that most people wouldn't view as any kind of accomplishment whatsoever, I actually have been trying to confront things that make me anxious and force myself to do things even though I feel afraid to do them, like uh... leaving other people are in the apartment (as in, like, chancing interactions with people LOL)

Also I've told a couple people about my autism diagnosis and most people like get weird about it like they aren't sure how they're supposed to react?? Like... I think that people don't know like... if they're supposed to feel bad or something because I think people don't really understand what autism is lol.

But uh personally I am happy to have the diagnosis because knowing I am autistic is a lot more helpful than wondering if I am -- basically all being autistic means is just that I experience the world differently from non-autistic people, and knowing this means I can better tailor my self-care and how I relate to others because I can better understand what kinds of special needs and circumstances I have.

Personally I don't think there's anything wrong with autistic people in general, no matter how it manifests, and I don't think it's really something that should hold people back or whatever -- though I think we live in a society that only values neurotypical people, so most problems autistic people face are problems caused by a lack of understanding or compassion from others, stigmatization, and trying to use goods, services, etc. that are created specifically for allistic people rather than the actual neurological differences themselves. Like when a left-handed person is injured from using a tool only designed for right-handed people, it is not because the person is ~afflicted~ with a ~left-handed disorder~ that makes them like... some broken subhuman that is less than a right-handed person... it just means that the design of the tool is flawed because it doesn't take into the account that not all people are the same.

Of course, there are some harmful things that autistic people can do to themselves or others, but not any more or less than harmful things allistic people may do to themselves or others, so... honestly autistic people are just different, and that's really it. It's just... a different kind of person to be. Just like speaking a different language and coming from different culutres or something, it just changes the way you communicate and experience the world, but it doesn't make you any less of a person or anything? And it's not really something to be pitied or whatever, it's just... being different.

But yeah I felt like this long before even realizing I might be autistic so I'm not just like... saying it because I got a diagnosis or something lol. And because I felt this way I was kind of shocked that other people seemed uncomfortable or pitying when I said I was diagnosed, though I guess I honestly should not be surprised because of the aforementioned stigma...

Um, in other news, this guy who I already forgot his name has been cast as the new Trek captain. I appreciate that it's an older man with a rectangle head but I'm sad that he's very ... British-looking and bald-faced. Though he is still quite handsome and I like his thin lips lmao.

OK I have rambled enough. Back to dev.

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-03 06:16 pm
lol I accidentally left my controller at my dad's... I was going to try to finish up unsaga this weekend. I guess now is a good time to get started on the website LOL. I can still play romasaga3 with keyboard I guess but... I don't really like doing that XD I do have enough stuff for one or two more play diary entries for it, though.

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-02 03:50 pm

So, I had my second therapy session today. It went really well. I actually like therapy even though I get super anxious about it, but that's the reason I'm there anyway, so...

I got an autism diagnosis today, too. So now I don't have to worry about that anymore lol. Also I got various anxiety techniques and perspectives... IDK, I don't really want to go into it too much lmao.

I'm getting pretty close to finishing Armic's scenario in unsaga. I'm not sure how I want to do the upcoming posts. I think instead of doing a 'subadventures digest,' I might just highlight one or two interesting subadventures and then just kind of gloss over the most important things that happened. Because in a lot, nothing particularly interesting happens, and we've already covered all of these adventures in more detail before.

Knight's Mausoleum is one that I haven't gone over yet, and I really want to. That might really be the only 'big' one left before the final adventure.

But yeah Armic has not only achieved but surpassed the role I was trying to go for with Kurt and Mythe before, so I'm really excited about that. He's a little magical powerhouse.

I've also been playing a bit of RSG3. But not enough to write a post yet.

I got all my grinding done in imsaga though XD And even raised Boston. Oh yeah, I wanted to upload a pic about that.

imsaga ramblingsCollapse )

Tags: , , , , ,

1CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-03-01 03:35 pm

life update time I guess!!!!

I don't remember when I last really talked about life things but I started therapy two weeks ago and I have to go again tomorrow. I'm really nervous about it because I was a wreck last time, because I had a Hell Week and that was like... the end of it. So I just kind of stared at the floor and nodded a lot lololol.

Anyway, after I got home from that I just passed out and slept for like 17 hours or something. Then I kind of had a cold for like ... 1.5 weeks, and I think I still kinda have it, and then this past weekend was actually very nice. I was feeling like... super confident and happy which is like a thing I never feel??? But uh I'm back to feeling bad again but probably because I am anxious about the thing.

I want to try to bring up autism this time but I don't want to get like immediately dismissed again lol. But I think up until this point I've been getting dismissed because like... this is really the kind of thing I should talk to my therapist about??

I feel like I've already said all this here?

Also I'm thirsty.

I'm still moving along in Armic's scenario. I've gotten three L4 tablets this playthrough, which is ridiculous. Sadly, two of them were not helpful...

I started another SCARLET GRACE run but I think I'm going to restart. I accidentally like... advanced the story and can't go back,a nd there was a lot of stuff I still wanted to do... plus IDK if I really want to start another game right now. I mean, I do, but I also want to work on some other stuff and not be wrapped up in this XD

I don't feel like doing anything today though T_T Except for worrying lmao.

Which I guess is why I'm writing this because I can't bring myself to do anything else X_X

Tags: , , , ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-02-28 12:25 am

Well, after a lot of running around, we're finally here.

Read more...Collapse )

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-02-27 07:39 pm



Well, the party has gotten worn down from a lot of random exploring, so I'm going to give them a bit of a break. We head back to Thranici to check out the geysers, which have easy battles in them, so we can switch in a bunch of substitute members, and see what some of our newbies look like.

Read more...Collapse )

Tags: , ,

CommentReply

thaao
thaao
Thaao Hanshew
2017-02-27 04:47 pm

With two Wu Xing weapons, it's time to wander around some more and see if we can find more things to do. At this point I'm mostly just running to a region I know has unfinished business or I suspect may have something new when I run out of things to do in another region.

So this time, we're headed back to Jusitania. That's the place where we killed the queen and got the pirates drunk.

Read more...Collapse )

Tags: ,

CommentReply